hola,long time no see
i haven't been writing for almost a month, fiuhh pretty long right ??
you know what, last week i sent my essay and well i get selected for APDSA in thailand, surely i literally wanna go there, but there are many worrisome things, like my close friends didn't get elected so it looks like i have to find a new companion, since i think if you are going somewhere, your dream place, you surely wanna go with someone close, so you won't be alone. but the fate says another thing, it looks like i need to find new friends..omo ! not only that, i'm rally afraid that this congress will spend a lot of money, i keep thinking how to pay for it. Of course i wanna go but if the cost is too high so i guess i'll just forget about it.sad, huh ??
yeah, sometimes life feels unfair, particularly for me.It feels like i have done so many things, i have tried really hard to get what i want  yet in the end i ( probably ) couldn't go.well this is really disappointing . because i'm eager to go, you know one of dreams is going to some place well by myself or together away from home, away from all problems i just wanna enjoy myself for once. I really really really want to go.Now, i'm just waiting and expecting a miracle to be happened , God knows i don't have that much money to  go, but i really wanna go. i just wish that God could hear me and He knows about my problem. That's it.at least the cost could get cheaper..i wish that i could go to Thailand. really this is a great opportunity and i can't just let it go..But, I'm sure and i believe God will give me the best, He allows to get selected so it's possible that He also allows me to go..God please hear my pray..I wanna go, really wanna go,,but i can't make it heavier for my daddy..He has already stressed with all these and i don't want to make him get burdened about my problems. Please God i need your guidance, just show me the best way of all this. I know you are the only who could help me.. Please God,, thanks a lot. I love you.

vocabularies

today i wanna share some vocabularies which i have learned in my toefl's course
1. Haida : red indians
2. Carve : memahat, mengukir
3. Totem poles : tiang lambang suku
4. To worship : to pray to
5. coat of arms : lambang
6. status : position, prestige
7. master : adj. *expert ahli
                       *skillful
8. figures : bentuk, gambar
9. honor : respect
10.a great deal : banyak ( uncountable )
11. Petty : small, minor, trivial inconsiderable, little importance
12. Visual : slide
13. Anxious : worried
14. go : develop, become
15.get something over with : to reach the end of something unpleasant or troublesome
16. jog someone memory : to make someone remember
17.back up : alternative
18.stuff : material
19.to get on with : to continue
20.imply : to suggest indirectly
21.unsupervise : tidak diawasi
22.institution : organization
23.criteria : standards, measures
24.initiation : introduction
25.enforcement : implementation
26.agencies :departments
27.force : angkatan
28.paraphernalia : accessories
29 turf : an area claimed by a group of people as it's own
30.to follow up : to continue
31.an eye opener : a surprising event
32.stages : steps
33.locker : a small cabinet
34.look up to : respect, admire  vs look down on
35. peewee : one that is relatively small
36. banger : noisy old car
37.hardcore: the small center group
38.assessment : judgement
39.extended : enlarge
40.naive : childlike
41.sort of : kind of, rather, in some degree
42.spending money : pocket money

that's the end for today...happy learning !!! ^^